Tim Allen’s Knowledge Of Nazi Germany Is…Not Great

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Over the weekend, legendary Home Improvement actor Tim Allen spoke out about his position as a conservative in Hollywood:

Regardless of how funny the idea of Shailene Woodley kicking the shit out of Tim “The Tool Man” Taylor as he grunts for his life is (and it’s very funny), maybe Tim has a point. Maybe being a famous conservative living in Hollywood is just like being Jewish during the Nazi regime. One thing’s for sure: Allen’s fans definitely agree with him.

Good point, Christine! On a completely unrelated note, let’s check in and see how much Tim Allen makes per episode of his hit sitcom, Last Man Standing. 

Pretty unbelievable that Tim Allen, who’s been an outspoken conservative for quite a while, is still making six figures an episode. But maybe his net worth will better reflect the precarious situation he’s put himself in.

Hmm… maybe not. If being right-wing in Hollywood was really the same thing as living as a Jew in 1930s Germany, shouldn’t he be losing money? You know, like how Jewish people had their wealth confiscated by the Nazis? 

With Hitler’s approval, Göring developed a three-step plan to confiscate Jewish wealth. First, all Jews would be required to declare their wealth. If they hid any assets, they would receive an automatic ten-year prison term and have their wealth confiscated.

Next, Göring used this data to institute a 20% tax on Jewish wealth, raising millions for the government. With the military budget still growing, however, deficits continued to soar and Goering moved to step three: In 1938, a law was passed nationalizing all property owned by German Jews.

Huh. It doesn’t look as though Jews living in Nazi Germany were paid $225,000 per episode of their TV shows. Pretty much the opposite, in fact. Most of them didn’t even have TV shows!

Well, okay. Hold on a second. Maybe Allen was referring to the fact that he lives in a horribly crowded ghetto in Poland? 

Here are a couple pictures of Tim’s recently-sold Hollywood home.

Hmm. Not 100% sure on this, but Jewish ghettos most likely weren’t nicer than this, right? Tim, your story is kinda falling apart here. Nothing really matches up with what you said.

Oh, wait a second – maybe Tim Allen was brutally murdered by Nazis? Maybe that’s what he meant by his “1930s Germany” comments? That’d make sense, right? If Tim Allen has been killed for his beliefs and/or ethnicity, we’d certainly have to admit that he has a good point.

Huh.

So Tim Allen is wealthy, presumably lives in a beautiful home, and is still alive. Which side of 1930s Germany was he referring to exactly?