Doug Jones Sweeps Every Demographic Except Voters Who Excuse Racism, Homophobia, and Pedophilia

(Bill Clark/CQ Roll Call)

Democrat Doug Jones scored an upset victory over Republican Roy Moore in Alabama’s special election for U.S. Senate, sweeping every demographic of voters except “people who believe a racist, homophobic, possible child molester with a limited grasp of the Constitution is still qualified to be a senator.”

The county-by-county voting map reveals regional divides within Alabama. Jones drew his greatest support from urban Birmingham, Huntsville, Montgomery, and Mobile, and the central region known as the Black Belt — regions that apparently consider service as a U.S. attorney to be a better qualifier for public office than being removed from the state Supreme Court for bigotry (twice) and reportedly being banned from the mall for being a creeper.

Moore, meanwhile, fared best in the rural counties of Alabama’s far north and far south — regions that apparently think it’s totally cool that the person representing them in the U.S. Senate has been accused of sexual advances on at least nine teenagers, who believes homosexuality should be illegal, who believes Muslims should be banned from Congress, and who believes all Constitutional amendments beyond the tenth were a mistake (including the one that outlawed slavery).

Political analysts have presented further demographic breakdowns, which again boil down to voters who thought racism, homophobia, and pedophilia were disqualifying traits and those who did not. It turns out that African Americans overwhelmingly were in the former group, and whites of all genders and education groups were in the latter. And yes, that even includes the fabled “moderate suburban white women,” who refuse to behave the way cable news pundits keep insisting they will.

Having triumphed in this referendum, Jones moves on to his next quest: getting seated in the U.S. Senate in a timely manner — a contest to be decided by the demographic of Senate Majority Leaders whose feelings on democracy vary depending on how much it helps their party.