Epic Space Fail! NASA’s Cassini Probe Crashes Into Saturn


File this story under “This oughta make you feel better about yourself:” NASA’s space probe, Cassini, has crashed into Saturn’s atmosphere! Whoops! Looks like even the best and brightest scientists in the world make mistakes. Great job, fellas – not!

According to Wikipedia, the total cost of the Cassini mission was a staggering three billion dollars. Yes, you read that correctly: that’s three billion dollars down the toilet! Yikes! Those three billion dollars could have paid for approximately eight hundred million McDonald’s Quarter Pounders. What a colossal waste of government resources!

How does something like this even happen? Aren’t there safeguards in place? When it comes to space probes, the last thing you want happening is for it to crash into a planet. Sounds like those eggheads down at Cape Canaveral have a bit of explaining to do. Somebody’s definitely getting fired over this massive bungle.

Hey, on the bright side, at least you’ve never screwed up this bad at work! What’s the worst thing you’ve done? Microwaved fish? Forgot to send an email? These morons did billions of dollars in damage to a high-tech probe! This blunder makes your office errors look like child’s play!

Cassini was meant to help us learn about Saturn, and instead, the only thing we’ve learned is that expensive spacecraft will disintegrate if they get too close to a gas giant. I could have told you that one for free! Duh!

So what’s the big takeaway here? As far as I’m concerned, if NASA keeps making mistakes like this, they should have their budget slashed. What’s the point of spending billions on space exploration if the only thing you’re going to explore is “what does the surface of this planet look like as we crash into it?” Do better, NASA – or at least learn how to control your probes.