New Idea for Guns: Mandatory “Are You Sure?” Dialog Box Before Shots Go Off

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This week, a tearful Obama introduced a series of long overdue gun control measures to address the lingering threat of gun violence. In addition to preventative efforts involving universal background checks and mental health care, the president instructed the Departments of Defense, Justice and Homeland Security to “conduct or sponsor research into gun safety technology that would reduce the frequency of accidental discharge or unauthorized use of firearms.”

Here are a few technological advancements we’d like to see:

1. Geotagging that Turns Gun Off in Movie Theaters

gun technology

Geotagging uses geographic coordinates to add identification metadata to media. Snapchat, for example, allows you to apply a Brooklyn filter to a photo or video only if you’re in Brooklyn. It would be helpful if guns automatically suspended their firing capabilities once the built-in GPS determines you just walked into a movie theater.

2.  “Are you sure?” dialog boxes

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You have to click like six of these to uninstall iTunes. This could drastically reduce the number of accidental gun deaths.

3. A built-in Bluetooth device that, if fired in a public building, overrides the PA system and begins playing “Breakfast At Tiffany’s” by Deep Blue Something

gun technology

Gunshots are sometimes mistaken for fireworks, and those mere seconds of initial uncertainty can be detrimental. There’s no mistaking “Breakfast At Tiffany’s,” a song that for over two decades has instilled an unprecedented degree of discomfort in its listener.

4. Nearby concealed-carrier app to track whether that guy with the gun over there is nuts or not

gun technology

It’s good to be aware of your surroundings. Once every firearm is trackable via GPS, green guns will signify that a verifiably responsible concealed-carrier is nearby, lending peace of mind to those around them. Red guns have been reported stolen and are relayed to local law enforcement automatically.

5. A program that scours social media and finds anyone that refers to their gun as a “toy” and compiles them into a database

gun technology

Pretty simple really. If you think a thing capable of fatally launching a projectile into another human is a toy, you don’t get to have your toy.